Tarik Woodbine Writing and Directing Debut with Daniel Beldy Editing
Tarik Woodbine Writing and Directing Debut with Daniel Beldy Editing

“Mommy, I want to be an actor.” Like so many parents, my reaction was: “Whaaaatttt?” Emotions flooded in. Disbelief, apprehension, fear and hoping that you didn’t hear what your child just said. Let’s be honest most of us dread when a child tells us he or she wants to pursue a career that is so challenging, filled with pitfalls and saturated with so many people that want the same thing. My reaction to my then 12-year-old son’s, Tarik’s, declaration of his career choice was boardline panic.

After a few minutes of reflection, I realized that it was not about me. It had nothing to do with me. It was about his dreams and aspirations. Before he was born, I promised to be his dream enabler and not to stifle his song. There are lots of young black men in the grave and in jail not living their dreams. Here it is, a dream that I didn’t expect. But one he wanted and I decided to support him in living.

To validate that it truly was his dream I told him to do some research. Find out about it, what it takes to become and actor? Where can he go to practice? What does it cost? How will it fit in my schedule to be able to support him getting back and forth? Within a week he gave me his report. It was thorough. I waited a month to see if his desire would lessen. It didn’t. His wings were beginning to stretch out for flight.

This began his journey into the acting world. He rehearsed lines, had doubts, disappointments, didn’t get some call backs, got small parts, but he never quit. He refused to give up. He won acting awards in high school. He also fulfilled my request that he finished college. He graduated Magna Cum Laude with a GPA of 3.85 from the University of Miami. Then he told me he was of to Los Angeles. Even now it hasn’t been easy. He had to get a job as a waiter to accommodate the schedule of auditions, acting classes, etc. He is flapping his wings. They are getting stronger.

He called me one day and said: “Mom, I am writing screenplays. I’m going to create some movies with my friends. Beldy (his friend from UM) is partnering up with me.” I was impressed with his Chutzpah. Instead of waiting for circumstances to come his way, he decided to make his own circumstances. He connected with others in the same situation and they began to create mini movies. Here is the first one Tarik wrote and directed with Beldy working on camera and editing. He is spreading his wings wider to be able to soar higher to new LEVELS.

It is said it takes a Village to raise a child. My heartfelt thanks go out to all of you that have already shared and send words of encouragement. Watch him in action. He is in the black and white top. Please share this with others; if you enjoyed watching it.

Everyone Needs a Hug!

Walking into the restaurant, my eyes locked with a lady sitting at a table with a mound of receipts in front of her. We smiled at each other. She was dressed in the garb of the workers, all in black. Her red hair was pulled back in a ponytail. Suddenly I had an intense urge to hug her. I walked over and said: “Hi, I need a hug.” She got up and chuckled: “I need a hug too!” I replied, “I know.” We hugged.

Then she shared with me that her husband is in the hospital. She was with him until 5:30 a.m. that morning and came directly into work. She was tired. I insisted that we hug again. I asked her for her name and her husband’s name. I told her that I would pray for them on my prayer line. She smiled at me, grasped my hand and thanked me. At that point another waitress came to seat my companion and me at a table. Not long after, I saw my hugger leaving.

I don’t know what prompted me to give her that needed hug. There I was tired from hosting an event for 118 people at the Division A Toastmasters Contests. I was drained and hungry because I hadn’t eaten all day. When I walked into that restaurant I was thinking about eating then going home to rest. I believe the Universal Spirit moved in me to show compassion towards my fellow hugger, but my leadership skills gave me the courage to approach her in the right way.

Leadership is about getting things done and inspiring others to do the things you need done. It is about being a visionary, being decisive and being strong in completing the vision. But it is also about being compassionate towards others. If you are not a compassionate leader, chances are you won’t have many people following you for too long. Showing that you care about others goes a long way in leadership. Add some compassion to your leadership bag today!

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Going the Distance

“We should not judge people by their peak of excellence; but by the distance they have traveled from the point where they started.” ~ Henry Ward Beecher

A friend of my son took a picture of him standing at the top of the trail of a mountain. I thought what a great shot and wished I was there also. Then it brought to mind that many people want to be at the top. Yet, are they willing to do the work it takes to get to the top? Are they willing to put in the sweat equity?

Henry Ward Beecher’s statement rings true to me. We often see winners at the top of their game, but we don’t take the time to see how hard they worked to get there.  It is Wednesday also known as Hump Day. Let’s strap on our own hiking boots and start walking our journey to the top. Let’s start going the distance! See you at the top!

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Phyllis the Diamond

 

Phyllis, you will be a contestant in the club’s Table Topics Contest,” I informed her as she entered the meeting room. “Marlene, I don’t think I can do it.” She replied. Knowing that she doubts her ability I insisted, “Yes. You can. I know you can. You have what it takes.” She smiled and said, “If you think I can do, then I will do it.”

Phyllis has the ability to speak, but she is fighting years of being told that she doesn’t have the potential to do anything well. Yet, each time she is given a gentle nudge to speak, she does it and better than she thought she could. I saw the opportunity to give her more self-confidence through the experience of competing in the club’s contest.  Phyllis not only entered the contest, she won first place.

She went on to represent the club in the Toastmasters District 47 Area 12 Table Topics Contest. Watching Phyllis using the tips (body language, vocal variety, eye contact) that we gave her along with her smile was a proud moment for me.  Knowing how much she doubts her ability and to see her take on the challenge of speaking in front of a room full of people is special to me. Phyllis won the second place award!

We hugged afterwards and she said, “Marlene, I want you to continue to coach me. I want to be just like you.” I told her, “No, Phyllis. I don’t want you to be just like me. I want you to be the best Phyllis you can be, the Diamond that I know you are.” She smiled broadly as though a light bulb went on above her head. She excitedly repeated, “I will be the best I can be.” Phyllis is on her way…shining bright like a Diamond.  Are you on your way?

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John Maxwell recently stated that we cannot motivate someone. Motivation comes from within oneself. What we can do is inspire others to do something or to follow our lead. I agree with his assessment. If someone doesn’t have the drive or the will do accomplish something, you cannot push him or her to do it. He/she has to see the value and benefit of accomplishing the task.

Our job as leaders is to understand that person; then, find the words and/or actions to demonstrate the value and benefit to him/her. But it starts with our own motivation. To motivate myself to complete my morning exercises, I look to nature to inspire me. Being able to see the sunrise in the morning and watching the seagulls soar gives me great pleasure. I use this as a reward for getting up at 5:30 a.m. and pushing myself to get started.

I like to take pictures of my morning scenes and to share them with others. I am pleasantly surprised to find that they are also inspired by these pictures. They tell me that they use these images to start their own fitness journeys.  Nature provides so many wonderful things for us to find inspiration in our leadership walk. Enjoy the photos below. How about you? What do you use as a source of inspiration for starting your day?

Live a Diamond Life. Live a Life of Purpose!

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