My son is getting ready to complete his undergraduate studies in May 2013. As I was cleaning his room at home (not much cleaning since he lives away), I came across some of his trophies and awards he won for his acting, singing, etc. Remembering how I felt when I was about to graduate from my undergraduate program, I knew that he must be a bit nervous about what is to come in his life after his graduation. I took a picture of two of his trophies and sent it to him with a message of encouragement. I wanted him to remember what he has already accomplished and that he has it in him to do even more.
Sometimes, as we go through life and face new challenges or enter an area outside our comfort zone, we become nervous and oftentimes start doubting our abilities to achieve the goal(s) before us. If you feel that way, stop and recall all that you have achieved and use it to propel you towards undertaking and accomplishing more. You did it before and you can do it again!
Excitedly, I drove along I95 towards the venue for our Toastmasters’ Area Contests on Saturday morning. As the contest chairperson, I left out early to ensure that I was in place to get everything ready prior to the attendees’ arrival. Daydreaming about how I wanted to arrange the room and envisioning the guests and contestants having a great time, I suddenly heard an unpleasant sound coming from my car. You know the one, the thud, bump, blop, and blop of a flat tire.
In complete disbelief, I started bargaining with God: “Please don’t let it be a flat, please don’t let it be a flat.” But the dashboard indicator light for tire trouble came on…yes it was a flat. I looked around and saw an exit was only a few feet away. I got off and my prayer changed: “Please let me be able to change this tire quickly!” (My brothers and taught me how to do this when I was younger. But who wanted to change a flat when one is all dressed for a meeting!)
As I exited the highway, I recalled that a gas station was a block away. I pulled into the station and open the door only to smell and see my tire smoking. A man walked out of the convenient store at the same moment. He asked: “Do you need any help?” It was as though the clouds parted and a ray of light shone around him. “DO I NEED HELP! Heck, Yeah!” I thought. I simply told him, pleadingly: “Yes. Pleaaasssseee.” He told me to move up more and he immediately started to help me. As I emptied the trunk to get to the spare (note to self…don’t keep junk in your trunk), he told me to leave the heavy lifting to him.
Then the next problem occurred. It seems that the lug nuts on my tire did not match the opening of the wrench for the car. He tried, but nothing worked. At that moment, another vehicle pulled it. The driver saw our struggles and asked if we needed help. We told him our dilemma and he pulled out a four-pronged wrench and one of the heads fitted. Hallelujah! Another parting of the clouds, another angel in place. Between the both of them, my tire was replaced. The second angel sold me the wrench for $5 and they both refused to take money for helping me change the tire. Hugs were given in place of money!
I happily drove off and made it to the venue well before most of the guests arrived. We had a most wonderful event! Afterwards, I drove to my mechanic and had to purchase a new tire for the car. He said I was very lucky that the car didn’t go out of control, because the tire was so badly damaged (see picture). I told him luck had nothing to do with it…God had His guardian angels around me that day!
There are many things I want to experience, accomplish and/or learn in life. I wanted to learn more about Emerson’s and Thoreau’s works, I got that in my Masters program. I wanted to live near the water; I got that when I moved by the Bay. I wanted to learn to ballroom dance; I did last year, thanks to my friends, Anita Fain Taylor and Miguel Seca. There was one thing that was a desire from a long time, one time that seemed far from my reach. This was to learn how to paint. I have painted rooms, chairs, etc., but I wanted to paint a picture.
My father painted when he was alive. My brothers know how to paint. They seem to acquire the talent naturally. My sister and I were not that fortunate to have this talent. Like a lot of people, I thought I could only draw stick men or do painting by number for the rest of my life. Then, appeared Conni Gordon. This almost ninety-year-young woman conducted a painting class that I was fortunate to be one of the students. The other participants and I had lots of doubts about our ability to paint anything, much less the ones we created. This painting included in this article is now one of my proudest possessions. Thank you Conni Gordon for fulfilling one of my life’s dreams.
Now to learn how to scuba dive, play the piano, a guitar and the drums; travel around the world; learn to speak French, Mandarin, and so on and so on!
My son showed me a YouTube video of a woman being interviewed by a news reporter about surviving a house fire. The woman was very animated in her recounting of the event. She told the reporter that she had to put clothes on before getting out of the house. During the excitement of the moment, she began to experience an episode of asthma. She said she told herself: ” Ain’t nobody got time for this.” Then she rushed out to safety.
Her animated recollection of the event was amusing to me at the moment as I watched the video. As I reflected on her words, which I now say to myself often, I realize that is what I, no we, need to do. We need to recognize what is important at every given moment. We should not let the “small stuff” get in the way of accomplishing the greater things.
Sometimes, we allow small things distract us from doing the things that will make us successful in life. Or we let trivial disagreements break up or prevent us from developing relationships with others. We spend too much time stressing over things that truly don’t matter in the overall scheme of living productive and happy lives. Next time you find you are in such a situation or mindset, change it. Say to yourself: “Ain’t nobody got time for this!”
I have a confession to make: I don’t often do what I know is right for my body! At least, that was at the beginning of 2012. It took my doctor yelling at me, literally, to get me to get serious about doing the right thing. After he told me that my test results show that I need to drop a few pounds. He reminded me that I have a history of diabetes in my family. He did not tell me how to correct the issue; he simply told me that I must do so.
Feeling surprised by his frankness and dejected about my lack of attention to my physical well being, I thought about what to do. Then, I admitted to myself that there is no magic to getting back into shape. I have to eat less and exercise more. What I was lacking was the willpower to push myself to do it. I always, put other people, such as my family, and my work before my health. Isn’t this the same for most of our situations?
We know darn well what it is we need to be successful in most areas of our lives, whether it is: saving more and spending less to have a healthy financial status; studying more to achieve a higher grade; or eating less to maintain or lose weight. We know the keys and methods to our success. We simply need to apply willpower, self-discipline, whatever you want to call it, to get us there. It isn’t an easy thing to do. If it is, many of us will not be where we are today. Sometimes, we need a little help to get us there.
After my doctor’s admonishment about my lack of respect for my body, I hired a personal trainer. Yes, I did! By making myself accountable to someone and committing to meet him at an appointed time and date, I feel obligated to be there and get the job done. Raymond Butler has been a great trainer for me. He has helped me build up my willpower to get up on the days that we are not training together to continue my healthy training and living. Ray discusses different ways for me to exercise as well as gives me tips on food that are great for me.
I am now more toned and have more energy. I lost weight in the process and feel more positive about myself. My doctor was so pleased with my last test result, he told me to continue with whatever I’m doing! I even got an awesome report from my dentist and my hair stylist! It seems what I am doing for my body is helping my overall health.
We already know the key to our success is applying our willpower to whatever task or challenge we face. Join me in exercising your willpower muscles today!
